Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
Randomize