This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Randomize
