I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
