You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Randomize
