So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
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