Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize
