I wanna bring you to show and tell
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
So much rum. So many feels.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
