Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Randomize
