school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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