Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize