Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
Randomize
