In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Randomize
