Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
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