We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize
