the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Randomize
