I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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