i'm lost and i look like a hooker
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize