i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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