To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Verdict: uncircumcised.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
