Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
The Olympian is in my bed
I think people are normalizing furries
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Randomize
