I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Randomize