is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
false alarm, still single
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
