The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Acid is not a monday night drug
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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