He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize