I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
thus making me awesome and them whores
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
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