How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
