I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
