why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
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