Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
