Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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