Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
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