it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize