Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
