You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
zippers are such a cool invention
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
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