Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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