we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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