Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
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