Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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