this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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