Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Randomize
