I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Randomize
