Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
