FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
