He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
