you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
birth control should be required to get into college
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
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