Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Randomize
