I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Randomize
