would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
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