sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
Randomize