Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
Randomize
