Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
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